what momma writes

this year we toned it down. and by toning it down we had 4.5 christmases instead of 5 or 6. we had a lovely time and it was much more fun with bird being 13 months than 1 month. shhhheeeeew. no offense to anyone with newborns around the holidays, but the thought of it brings back exhaustion. (if i have anything to do with it, a spring or summer baby we shall create... not any time soon). below are some picture hi.lites. i snapped what felt like, millions of pics, but truth be told, when there are 3 little people and relatives in town i didn't snap all that many good ones when it comes down to it. stella on christmas morning with her new handmade fox from the city flea / let's play the game 'get 3 kids under 3 to smile with their great grandparents / playing at grandma and grandpas / pockets in the snow / me with TWO tired ONE year olds (please excuse my wine stained teeth and stella's hair bows in my hair) / zonked from present opening. whe

i guess this is a pretty loaded title as it could mean many things, but i've talking efficiency here. not a day goes by that i don't want to spend more time with my kid, i finally feel like i have my arms wrapped around this mothering thing. and it's the one who made me a mother that i have to thank. i can thank miss bird for helping me slow down and speed up. you see, prior to stella i would have endless 'to do' lists and daily schedules and didn't really understand the undertaking of the word relaxation. these daily 'to do' lists were deemed a failure and the day was considered unproductive if i didn't cross off close to all of the items. well, confession: i still have 'to do' lists. sometimes daily, some weekly and at times there is a general or miscellaneous section on the list. the difference is how this lists are graded. instead of grading my day on what is crossed off - they are general guidelines and reminders of the thing

i, like so many other blogger friends, haven't felt driven to post our day-to-day posts as they seem a little more trivial with such tragedy surrounding us. why does it take situations like this to remind us to create perspective in our own lives? this morning as i was getting ready, my mother in law popped up to see if she needed to get bird. much to her surprise she was sleeping. her face said "wow! she's still asleep - it obviously was a great nite for everyone!!" while my face said "don't let her fool you. she was up twice and she is STILL sleeping only because i, ever so gingerly, laid her back in her bed so i could get ready" and then i grumbled and groaned in complain mode about how she keeps getting up even though i implemented the "cry it out method" on the fly last week. (it worked for a night and then not, and then worked and then didn't... so far i'm not sure i buy this BS). i proceeded to eat my breakfast and decid