what momma writes

today is just good. i made no real plans. it went something like this wake up after some good sleep. finally. morning playfulness. i let bird watch 30 minutes of thomas the train while i got myself together (what a treat!) headed out to a coffee shop.      split a morning glory muffin and banana and i had such a yummy coffee beverage.      walked to the park; swinging, playing, running, sliding, tree hugging occurred. bird had some quiet alone time play. emptied the dishwasher & watered the plants together. moma and bird read her letter cards and some books. snuggled on the rocker for 10 minutes into napland. it's nothing spectacular and i know every day can't be like this, but it's made me a happy human today. only thing missing is daddy.

i posted this picture on my fb page and it caused some discussion. i like discussion. sometimes i'm not the best fb "discusser" but over all i like when things strike a cord in people drawing to a conversation. i didn't reply on fb bc i didn't find the time to gather my thoughts, but here goes... keep in mind these are my thoughts and conclusions. i'm no expert, but i'm only my own expert as i do my own research. i used to think homeschooling was weird. as a catholic school girl 1st-12th grade and growing up the only homeschoolers we knew of were through our church. the mom had long hair past her butt and swayed to the hymns with her hands held high and she had 6 or so kids (also not the norm). while this was deemed weird in my book at the time, i look at it now and think "sway away" to each their own. and kudos to them for going against the grain. today my views are changed, just like a large portion of what i believed growing up. that&#

I've been truly blessed to have had all my grandparents for 30 years of my life. Today my first grandparent shed his body and entered into the next phase of his spiritual life. While I know he's so very at peace and I'm so happy for him that he's experiencing the bliss of afterlife I'll still miss him.   My dad, my grandma and uncle were there to send him off to new life and comfort him during his last earthly breaths. It sounded like it was peaceful transfer and that is what he wanted. He was able to die at home, in bed surrounded by some loved ones. Grandpa told me a number of times "Caren, ah, it's hell to get old." as he talked through his frustrations of his declining health.   For the last year and half he's been up and down with some major health issues, so I've had time to mentally prepare for the day I would "lose" him. But, no matter how much I prepare for the inevitable, it still hurts. I still cried (I might not be do

dear stellaluna, you are just short of 21 months. it's eery, amazing and wonderful that i have an almost two year old. you continue to amaze me daily. i've stopped paying attention to silly milestones because honestly i don't know what they are at this age, but you seem to be developing just fine in all aspects so there's that. i stopped counting your words since your vocabulary sky rocketed on vacation. well, let's be honest, i stopped counting before that, but after vacation there was a huge jump! you repeat everything; words you already know, words you don't know. i think it's safe to say you are a talker. when we read books, you now say the objects in the books and know what words you want to hear. it's your own way of reading i suppose and it makes me melt. somehow we've been lucky enough to have you miss all the curse words to repeat. i keep saying, it's only a matter of time bc i have a slight issue with a potty mouth. perhaps it will

this post is a little silly, but it got me thinking. over the weekend, bird and I attended a 4 year old birthday party. like most birthday parties or gatherings we attend, bird beats to her own rhythm and bops around curiously exploring her new environment. getting her hands (and feet and at times mouth) all over whatever she can... at some point she will find her level of comfort and level of exploration satisfaction and find interest in the big dogs (aka older children). after things calmed down, I let stella in the birthday party bounce house with 3 other children (one being the birthday girl) who were old enough to know to be gentle with her in there. (I have to admit, bounce houses make me nervous with such a little thing, but go figure she loved it running back and forth saying "bouncy bouncy bouncy" like tigger). these same 3 girls ended up inside shortly after and I happened to be changing bird's diaper. bird proceeded to repeat all their names and the bir