happy 1 week little miss!

dear stella,

how in the world has it been a week already?

that scares me because that means one week closer to not being home with you.

(i know, i shouldn't look at it like that).

we are really making progress after some hoops.

nothing major, but it's nice to see us working together 

and finding out what works for us.

right now you are resting on my shoulder as i type.

not sure how long this will last, but you seem to want body contact 

so i'm holding you close and writing to you.

i love your little noises. i know you don't mean to make them, but i love them.

i love when you smile, even though right now it's just a reflex. it still warms me.

you are quite the heavy breather and ferocious eater.

you are a quick eater these days as your latch is improving.

i'm also getting the hang of things with your latch, your cues and your feeding times.

it seems you prefer sleep to food.

(you would make any bottle feeding moma proud haha!)

but i don't see any other route than to breastfeed you as it will be a huge benefit to 

everyone in the long run, so these hurdles we have leapt over 

and the hurdles to come are all worth it in my book.

(hopefully in your book too).

you did scare us last night when you projectile vomitted all over the bed. 

it seemed odd to have you be sick and i didn't think you were.

apparently when babies eat too much, too quickly it comes up

in the projectile form.

you tummy is so small and you eat so fast so it makes sense.

you are your father's child.

IMO, in looks.

and in sleepinggggggg 

zzzZZZZ ZZZ zZZz ZZZZ ZZZ ZZzzz

i started out trying to wake you for feedings when my boobs were full, 

but honestly you were hard to wake up so i'm training my boobs to go on your schedule.

technically i think that is what i am supposed to do.

apparently i am a good producer so i can't complain, 

but there are times, kid when i think my boobs may implode.

(sometimes they do. TMI? eh oh well).

breastfeeding is very messy the first few weeks.

so i have learned...

thankfully friends / support i have talked to assure me it's normal

 and it won't always be this way.

with my production comes your liquidation.

as soon as i finish feeding you, you already have emptied the remaining contents in your tummy.

all the docs and midwives and lactaction folks say it's good.

so uh, good job stel.

you do not like when we have to straighten your legs for diaper changes.

in the womb you must have had them pretty tied up close to you.

i have to remind you to gently relax your legs.

you are getting better, but still not a huge fan.

today marks you out of newborn diapers!

yay for growth, but boo for the NB one's we didn't get to use...

that's the way it goes.

you lost your cord yesterday too!

we were taking an herb bath and i gave you to daddy to dry off and there it was hanging there.

an hour later, you are officially independent.

(you clearly are so advanced!)

all and all you are a pretty chill 1 week old.

we have worlds of time for you to change, but for now you treat us pretty nicely.

thanks for being patient with daddy and me.

you are the newborn, but we are the newborn parents.

bare with us.

we love you.

m+d