hurdles [the future]
i don't let my worries or woes of the future rent much space in my head anymore (or at least recently).
it's a nice feeling, but i would be lying if i said i didn't think about what's in store for my dear gal and growing up in a world that is overstimulated with social media and technology coupled with the underlying pressures of society's idea of what it means to be female.
with that, i'll write to my daughter's future.
...
my stella,
it is always my utmost goal to keep you happy, healthy and safe. as you get older, i realize this will become more challenging. you are already such a sponge. you will grow into your own and your curiosity will lead you to make more and more decisions on your own. it's my hope that your daddy and i can instill a sense of confidence and creativity in you and perhaps it will deter your curiosity to experiment with every parents worries.
it's amazing how after having you, i am more cognizant and critical of the choices i made along the way. honestly, all and all i was a good kid/young adult, but it's scary to think that you will be face to face with the world some day, without mama and dada to physically guide you. i know my successes and errors have shaped me just as your path and choices will shape your journey.
before we know it you'll be in school. one day you'll be tempted by yourself or others to belittle someone. just as i never want you to be a target, please don't target someone else. i pray we've done a good job teaching you about people's differences and embracing others. the world can be brutal especially when it comes to fitting in.
daddy and i already cringe at the thought of you liking rap or synthesizer-induced music. i hope we have molded the roots for a deeper appreciation of music. i know there will be outside influence on music taste from your peers. don't be afraid to hold true to what you like. i think back to my college days when i "liked" what i classify as awful music since it was what the crowd preferred. i promise i'll do my best not to judge your taste, but secretly i'll be praying it's a phase.
down the road you'll be curious about drugs and alcohol. we will do our best to utilize teaching moments prior, but ultimately you'll be offered and have to make your own choices. i know it's natural to experiment. i did a pretty good job, but i didn't always make the smartest decisions. i'll tell you, it's hard. whatever you decide, i hope you act responsibly and have friends like i did. these temptations can cover the real you and i hope you never feel that you have to hide your true self. i'll always be here when you feel you don't fit the mold.
stella, you have no idea yet.... you have no idea how girls are being sexualized at such a young age.
the way many young girls dress is disturbing. our media has taken the classy out of fashion for young girls. i shudder as i look at prom dresses that practically show teenage girls' genitals. fashion and style can be an art form. please don't misuse this form of art. i will do my best to teach you to value your body while being able to show expression if you so choose. it saddens me to see girls sexualized through fashion and advertisements. the world is going to tell you how to dress whether you like it or not. hold true to your own expressions. you don't have to wear pink to be a woman. you don't have to wear tight clothes to be feminine. what you wear doesn't define you. (and this is coming from a moma that likes fashion).
one day you will fall for a boy (or girl?). it's too far away to fathom, but it will more than likely, inevitably happen. when you think about sex, as a mother, i HOPE we have honest and open talks about "relationshipping" and love (and sex). and if not me, i ask that you are blessed with great friends and mentors to turn to... no parent wants their baby to hurt, but know that heartache and heartbreak of any form only lead to growth.
and lastly, my child, if i can bestow anything to you as i write to your future self, my best advice is to love yourself. loving yourself doesn't just include the emotion. love you wholeheartedly; mind, spirit, body. exercise and feed your mind, spirit and body. i don't expect you to understand this for a while, but someday i think you might. a happy, healthy body makes a happier, healthier soul.
although i tell you daily, i'll write it again.
i'll love you as you weave your way through growing up.
i'll be here to help you navigate and pray you make wise decisions, knowing you'll have to waiver along the way as it's part of learning. i'll be here for you even when you think there is no way i'll understand what it is you feel inside. i'll love you through your life lessons and hope you can love me as i learn more of mine.
i promise i'll love you forever. even when it hurts.
it's a nice feeling, but i would be lying if i said i didn't think about what's in store for my dear gal and growing up in a world that is overstimulated with social media and technology coupled with the underlying pressures of society's idea of what it means to be female.
with that, i'll write to my daughter's future.
...
my stella,
it is always my utmost goal to keep you happy, healthy and safe. as you get older, i realize this will become more challenging. you are already such a sponge. you will grow into your own and your curiosity will lead you to make more and more decisions on your own. it's my hope that your daddy and i can instill a sense of confidence and creativity in you and perhaps it will deter your curiosity to experiment with every parents worries.
it's amazing how after having you, i am more cognizant and critical of the choices i made along the way. honestly, all and all i was a good kid/young adult, but it's scary to think that you will be face to face with the world some day, without mama and dada to physically guide you. i know my successes and errors have shaped me just as your path and choices will shape your journey.
before we know it you'll be in school. one day you'll be tempted by yourself or others to belittle someone. just as i never want you to be a target, please don't target someone else. i pray we've done a good job teaching you about people's differences and embracing others. the world can be brutal especially when it comes to fitting in.
daddy and i already cringe at the thought of you liking rap or synthesizer-induced music. i hope we have molded the roots for a deeper appreciation of music. i know there will be outside influence on music taste from your peers. don't be afraid to hold true to what you like. i think back to my college days when i "liked" what i classify as awful music since it was what the crowd preferred. i promise i'll do my best not to judge your taste, but secretly i'll be praying it's a phase.
down the road you'll be curious about drugs and alcohol. we will do our best to utilize teaching moments prior, but ultimately you'll be offered and have to make your own choices. i know it's natural to experiment. i did a pretty good job, but i didn't always make the smartest decisions. i'll tell you, it's hard. whatever you decide, i hope you act responsibly and have friends like i did. these temptations can cover the real you and i hope you never feel that you have to hide your true self. i'll always be here when you feel you don't fit the mold.
stella, you have no idea yet.... you have no idea how girls are being sexualized at such a young age.
the way many young girls dress is disturbing. our media has taken the classy out of fashion for young girls. i shudder as i look at prom dresses that practically show teenage girls' genitals. fashion and style can be an art form. please don't misuse this form of art. i will do my best to teach you to value your body while being able to show expression if you so choose. it saddens me to see girls sexualized through fashion and advertisements. the world is going to tell you how to dress whether you like it or not. hold true to your own expressions. you don't have to wear pink to be a woman. you don't have to wear tight clothes to be feminine. what you wear doesn't define you. (and this is coming from a moma that likes fashion).
one day you will fall for a boy (or girl?). it's too far away to fathom, but it will more than likely, inevitably happen. when you think about sex, as a mother, i HOPE we have honest and open talks about "relationshipping" and love (and sex). and if not me, i ask that you are blessed with great friends and mentors to turn to... no parent wants their baby to hurt, but know that heartache and heartbreak of any form only lead to growth.
and lastly, my child, if i can bestow anything to you as i write to your future self, my best advice is to love yourself. loving yourself doesn't just include the emotion. love you wholeheartedly; mind, spirit, body. exercise and feed your mind, spirit and body. i don't expect you to understand this for a while, but someday i think you might. a happy, healthy body makes a happier, healthier soul.
although i tell you daily, i'll write it again.
i'll love you as you weave your way through growing up.
i'll be here to help you navigate and pray you make wise decisions, knowing you'll have to waiver along the way as it's part of learning. i'll be here for you even when you think there is no way i'll understand what it is you feel inside. i'll love you through your life lessons and hope you can love me as i learn more of mine.
i promise i'll love you forever. even when it hurts.
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